Brief Sentiments

Guilty, Happy and Lost

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 13:39:00 +0000

Guilty and happy, what can I say. I feel fulfilled. I feel wanted. I feel special. I feel sexy and beautiful. I feel satisfied. I feel free. But I know somewhere I should feel guilty and maybe I do...but somewhere I don't. I only feel afraid simply because I dont want to hurt someone's feelings. I dont feel LOVE and being LOVED anymore. Maybe I do feel LOVED but not ready for this kind of love yet. I am confuse where to go and what to do. I want to be free but I dont know how. I will leave everything to GOD. And if I did something wrong, I ask for his forgiveness. I hope he will make me feel and show me the right path because I am so LOST.

Insane Material Desire

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 05:19:00 +0000

A new insane thoughts for material things. Quite tempting and interesting experience but who knows? Am I that pretty? Am I that worth it? This is really giving my ego a big boost for my age. A temptation at this time of my life that we are having some financial trouble. Giving me full attention that makes me feel so important and valuable like a princess. I want to enjoy life while I can. I know know this is insane.!!! But who knows?

Fixing The Broken

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 16:36:00 +0000

Confuse but something tells me something. Not everyone that I think that needs it will just simply grab it. Some people just need it simply as part of LOVE and caring. I am so thankful for God's guidance for giving me the right people to be behind my confusion that was cause by pain and sorrows. I don't know if the PAIN can be healed or will I ever find the LOVE that I once found. Or will I ever stop finding solution of this lost LOVE. Or did I ever felt the LOVE at all. It's been broken and I don't know how to fix it anymore.

I Started It Again

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 15:23:00 +0000

I really missed it so I can't control myself but to start it again. This is really how I am bored with my life. I always look for something that will keep my mind off the boredom and probably, frustration and disappointment in my sorroundings particularly at work. The conversation makes me look forward on something that will keep me smiling. A true smile that comes from within. I don't know if what I am doing is right. But I keep my faith that God will never leave me in times of my confusion.

Confuse and Lost

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 20:52:00 +0000

I think it is better to stop and see where it will lead instead of me trying to keep it going. I will let it go where it has to go. In the first place, I shouldn't be the one leading it. I don't know why am I like this. I am always searching for something I shouldn't. Is this really how bored I am? I guess it is true. I am confuse and don't know where should I go because of so much pain of lieas and cheating. Everything is a mess. I am trying my best to heal myself but I believe that I can't do it alone. I don't want to say any words about it. I will just go wherever my feet takes me.

No Way

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 00:11:00 +0000

Normal dull moment. Just probably don't know the right approach and it will never gonna come from me!! No way !!!.. Just so be it!!! It will happen, if it will happen. It will not happen and it won't happen.. I am leaving everything to God. I will just go with the flow of life!! I will just let it go!!

True Meaning

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 16:09:00 +0000

Now the normal conversation turned out to be another the old ways... It's so funny and confusing.. Probably trying to control, but it keeps going back to it's true meaning... Now I think I know why it never stop. It's just there, and when it's there, it is really hard to stop. It's just the way it is. It is really scary to think where it will lead.

Strange Conversation

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 15:33:00 +0000

The conversation is very alive and very normal. It's very strange for me. I am not sure if this is a trick that will loose my sight on the right path, or it is just simply the way it should be from now on. Whatever it is, I like it because it is helping me pass the time without seeing some annoying act around me. Very smooth!!!

Strange Feeling

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:56:00 +0000

I feel strange about the conversation. A very normal conversation of two good friends. I just wonder why? I wonder if this is a trick or what? A technique on how to get my trust or just a change of mind from something intimate into a simple friendship. Whatever it is, I will leave eevrything to God!!!

Insanity No More

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 08:19:00 +0000

Yeah!! I still have this insanity in my head simply because I need a little spice in my life. But then, I know I won't get lost this time. I am very well focus in doing more important things in life. I won't get my insanity get in my way anymore.

I am focus on my blogging, online business, fitness and my family. I want to make sure that my blogs are regularly updated; I've been having a hard time making orders on time, but I will try my best to focus on this as well; I am happy that despite of my busy schedule, I was able to spend time going to the gym and add running to my fitness goal; My house doesn't look as messy as before. I always make sure that my kitchen is tidy and doesn't get filty during the day; I don't have much load of laundry as before as I make sure to load it on the weekend; Insanity no more.

Definitely Focused

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 08:34:00 +0000

Yes I am so happy and so much smile inside but this time I know that my mind is very much focus on the important things I need to do. I am so happy to do everything that I need to do for my online business, despite the fact that my mind and heart is flying with JOY. I will definitely won't lose my concentration anymore. SMILING!!!

So Happy With Special Smile

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 20:00:00 +0000

I am so happy and glad for some reason. The feelings that I have been trying to denied is coming alive again. This special smile is back and I really dont know how to stop it. I have tried to turn the other way, and now it's back. I am so happy.!!! But this time, I will make sure to focus my mind on all the things that are more important in life. Never will I lose my focus this time. I will just simply enjoy life!!!

Unfair WHY?

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 14:36:00 +0000

Whats with me? Why am I desiring for this? Why am I feeling so much revenge in my heart? Why I keep thinking of all the unfair things that was done to me? Is revenge will help me ease all the pain? Everything is so unfair. It's been so long since I am being ignored for nonsense things. Is it really what life should be?

He cheated on my too early. He made me feel disrespected so early. WHY? and Why am I putting the blame on myself just to find reason to forgive him. I have probably forgiven him but it is so hard to forget. Pain keeps coming back and I can't do anything because he is part of my life.

No I have to put in my head that it's just a different level of LOVE? It's been this way for a long time now and it doesn't happen only now. It's so UNFAIR.. I want to be happy by being treated as someone SPECIAL

Butterfly No More

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 13:45:00 +0000

Butterfly in my stomach yeahhh!!!! But that will not ruin my focus in life no more. There are more important things to focus my mind on. I just feel so happy and glad to feel this way again. I am always praying for guidance and if this is what will lead me to, and so be it.

Shyness Or Fear

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 19:18:00 +0000

It maybe true. It is more on shyness than fear. And it takes a lot of effort to earn trust and confidence from someone. And I guess, finding it takes alot of time too. God is with me and I know he will never get tired of guiding me. I hope this negativity in my heart will soon be healed.

Nothing Is Perfect

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 04:49:00 +0000

My insanity is subsiding again and God is always good to me. He always makes me realized something. It is not easy to find someone who will truly love you. And if you do, there will always be something that you will never be satisfied with, simply because nobody is perfect.

Frustrating and Disappointing

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 13:38:00 +0000

Pissed with a lot of things today and most of all pissed of something which is making me realized a strong message from GOD. Stupid me to keep searching for something I already have. Searching can be such frustrating and disappointing... It's just the same as staying into something that is already frustrating and disaapointing. Life is full of challenges and questions.

Overused and Dead

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 17:51:00 +0000

Someone new again but the message is more clearer to start with. I hope to hear from the person again. But right now, I am still very much enjoying the friendship with the other one.

Why am I like this? I keep asking myself why? Is this how lonely I am? I am waiting for God's message on this. I am very unhappy somewhere inside me. I feel like my heart have been overused to pain. It's dead and I am trying to find a way to make it alive again.

Love My New Look

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 15:02:00 +0000

I love the way my bangs fits into my oval face. I always have bang eversince which fits my oval face, but because of the nature of my work here in Canada, that require to wear a hairnet, I have no choice but to give up having bangs. It looks weird after taking off the hairnet.
t I plan to keep this hairstyle for now. It covers my wide forehead and makes me look younger. I just love making myself pretty.

Special Friend To Smile

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 10:01:00 +0000

I had a good quite long chat with one special friend. It is truly nice to have a special friend even if it is just online. It gives me extra smile in and out. Very open communication and no secret or so. Sharing laugh and compliment that is truly joyful to read at. I dont know where this will lead but so far, I am happy being a friend and having a friend. I dont see anything wrong with this. Just having fun getting to know someone.

The Truth About My Looks

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 08:37:00 +0000

Me and the kids will go to Bramalea Centre tomorrow. Somewhere inside me, I am hoping to see someone because of my curiousity to see the look in person. Although, it is quite impossible because the mall is quite big and many people, but I realy hope that a short glance is possible. I will make sure to look good tomorrow.

Aside from that, I want to feed my ego or if not, hear the truth about how people see me in person compare to picture. I am tired of hearing that I am just photogenic. As if I look so different in person. How is that going to happen, when I never fix or photoshop any of my pictures. I just crop it to fit on the screen and remove the ugly background. It's the same nose, eyes and lips. However, some skin imperfection is not visible on picture making me look better.

Like It When Busy

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 09:08:00 +0000

I only have one message from my new inspiration online. I was hoping to chat but didn't catch. The message is quite dull and I was hoping to have something for me to smile. But yet, knowing that I was the favorite gives me something to smile about. I am hoping to have faster communication because I really like it when I am busy with something.

Anyway, I am enjoying watching the teleserye online. It has been quite a while since I was addicted to watching teleserye. I am glad I did. At least, there is something that makes me busy on my more than one week vacation from work.

New Inspiration To Smile

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 11:39:00 +0000

I have a new inspiration to smile. It just feels so good to know that there is someone giving you a special kind of attention. Someone is going crazy looking at your pictures and always wanted to hear from you. And it feels so good to know that gorgeaous human beings are going nuts with my smile. Just enjoying!!

Losing Weight For Myself

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 15:47:00 +0000

I started my diet today. I want to lose weight so I will look my best when I meet someone again. Just some boosting of ego!!! Having fun with my boring life. I wish my bestfriend from Saudi Arabia will be here soon, so I can have fun with someone I can trust.

I am hoping to lose at least 5 pounds before new year. I will make sure not to gain weight and be fat ever again. A lot of people who hate me will be happy if I ever get fat again. No way!!!

Just Having Fun

noreply@blogger.com (Tey) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 07:07:00 +0000

I am having fun with new people on a new site. But this time, I know I wont let anythings to ruin my daily life routine. Just a little fun to spice up my life and boost my dying ego. hahahha!!!

Hating hubby again for his weird attitude of addiction for some stupid things. I sometimes think he has mental disorder. He make himself sober for these nonsense things. Lack of Sleep and spending too much hour infront of the playstation. I dont know why I end up with this weirdo. I wont dwell myself on this weirdness!!! I will have fun by myself.